Week 2: Our Truths, Our Voices

I don’t think I would know who I am today if I didn’t keep a journal. I don’t use it that often anymore, but every now and then when I have an argument with my mom or breakup with a partner, it helps me sort out my feelings by writing them down. As Luella B. Cook mentions in her article “Writing as Self-Revelation,” we often don’t know what we want to say until we begin to write. Similarly, I don’t know how I feel until I write it down.

When I write in my journal, it is for my eyes only. I simply pick up a pen and scribble away, leaving everything on the page and holding nothing back. Which is exactly why my journal is for my eyes only.

Being vulnerable is hard enough to do with yourself, let alone with other people. We’ve all heard that we have to love ourselves before we can truly love someone else, and I also think we have to be honest with ourselves before we can be honest with others. Cook sums it up nicely in her article when she explains that those who are successful at oral communication have a strong sense of self, which, she argues, is something we can all cultivate through self-reflective writing. Like, for example, in a journal.

Writing about yourself and for yourself teaches you about yourself. It’s like you’re having a conversation with your subconscious, which allows you to finally understand the real reason you’re angry with your mom and that your boyfriend probably didn’t deserve you anyway. These are topics we may not want to discuss with others, even those closest to us, and we won’t have these conversations with ourselves out loud (I mean, obviously. Who talks to themselves? That would be so weird…), so writing allows us to explore our thoughts and feelings in the privacy of our own notebook. Like the author of “Goody Two Shoes” says, writing allows us to speak our truth and thereby find our voice:

“Writing can teach us the dignity of speaking the truth, and it spreads out from the page into all of our life, and it should. Otherwise, there is too much of a schism between who we are as writers and how we live our daily lives. That is the challenge: to let writing teach us about life and life about writing.”

In this way, writers can learn a great deal from their private journals, but, especially because no one else is intended to read them, others can’t really learn from these entries. And rightly so. Those are the writer’s own personal thoughts, and they should always get the final say over whether or not to share them and if they do, who to share them with.

Online diaries, while they are also typically very personal, can be viewed by potentially millions of pairs of eyes. For this reason, I don’t expect the authors of these entries to write in a stream of consciousness style the way I personally do when writing in my private journal. These bloggers have an audience, a very public one at that, and whether it’s intentional or not, their posts will be influenced by this awareness. Unlike private journals, however, it’s not just the author who learns from their writing— lots of other internet users have access to the knowledge and perspectives bloggers share.

Of course, this begs the question of how much we should share about ourselves. For me, the more the merrier. Perhaps I’m just nosy, but I love learning about others’ lives and their dreams, goals, favorite things, traveling recommendations, recipes, and whatever else they choose to write about. I love the idea of writing about myself online too and have even considered starting a blog of my own in the past (if only I had the time!). It could be a great opportunity to connect with others who may be experiencing the same things as I am or that I simply have a lot in common with. The world is big and full of lots of wonderful people I will probably never get to meet but conversing with some of these individuals through a blog could give me a chance to do so, albeit only virtually.

Plus, there can be something comforting about sharing intimate details about yourself and being vulnerable with an unknown audience precisely because they don’t know you personally. Madeleine Sorapure even gives examples in her article “Screening Moments, Scrolling Lives” of bloggers who have asked their audience on their website not to read their content if they know them in real life. Strangers tend to listen. Your friends and family tend to offer solutions. Sometimes, a stranger’s ear is all you really need.

Ultimately, whether people should or should not share their personal dreams, thoughts, goals, etc. is completely up to whatever each individual is comfortable with. As for oversharing, I don’t think there’s such a thing. Like I said, the more the merrier. I believe the more open and vulnerable you are, the more you can actually further develop your voice and your purpose. You can find a greater truth.

This truth that others share on their blogs is exactly why I love reading them. It’s probably why a lot of people like reading them. Learning about others’ lives and their truths and their perspectives opens our eyes to the diversity of human life and experiences. Hearing others’ stories, accomplishments, hopes, dreams, knowledge, etc. gives us something valuable and can inspire us to change something in our own lives. Some of my favorite bloggers, like Venetia Falconer and Zanna Van Dijk share their struggles with anxiety and stress, their efforts to lead a more sustainable lifestyle, and all sorts of other knowledge with their audiences from everything to beauty to food to finances. Maybe it sounds cliché, but I don’t think I’m the only one who would agree that it’s inspiring.

Perhaps some blogs have a few typos, some spelling errors, or organizational issues, but this isn’t the world of academia. Of course, it would be beneficial to use coherence and structure in order to attract and keep a readership for an online diary, but I don’t believe it’s an essential aspect. Name dropping, on the other hand, could be a major issue in blog entries. The best approach in my opinion would be to ask for permission before using anyone’s name. In a private journal, especially if it really will only be seen by the writer’s eyes, all of this becomes irrelevant. Again, it’s not the world of academia, and applying the pressures of that world to such personal writing seems unnecessary.

Overall, journals, whether online or private, create and reflect our voices. And those voices allow us to be heard. As John Grisham said in his commencement address at UNC Chapel Hill in 2010, “Isn’t that one of our greatest fears? That we will not be heard? …

“To be heard, you must find a voice.”