Week 6: Vicarious Memoirs

Growing Up In Therapy by Lena Dunham portrayed a story that I could really see myself in. When I was about five I also had suffered from OCD immediately following my parents divorce. I understood how mentally taxing this disorder can be, especially when you are a young child. While I was very lucky to have parents who immediately took me to a child psychologist, I was able to overcome this disorder within the same year that it began to control my life. While Dunham’s experience correlates to mine in a sense, I did find myself forming a more emotional connection to her words as compared to Cousins. Growing Up In Therapy evoked remnants of my emotional past, and reading Dunham’s story felt like I was reliving my own childhood in a sense. I also was subjected to the culture of therapy at a young age, and I recall having similar revelations to Dunham’s throughout my own experience with this disorder.

Contrary to Dunhams narrative, in the very short story of Cousins, I really struggled to form any sense of connection to the content depicted. I read this post immediately after finishing Dunham's work. Both bodies of work are crafted in a completely different matter, and I could not “see myself” in Cousins like I could see myself in Growing Up In Therapy. While I initially saw the length of Cousins, I assumed it would be the better read of the two because often times “less is more”. Despite my predictions, the author of Cousins did not offer enough detail to really intrigue me as the reader. I understood the overall plot of the story, but I think that this post lacked some of the basic characteristics required for a memoir. The author neglected to share any information that would help me as the reader interpret what had caused the initial conflict with their cousin; the conflict that inevitably resulted in her decision to leave in the middle of the night. Because the author did not share this information, I really struggled as the reader to connect to the emotional aptitude of the entire piece because I did not feel invested enough in this author’s story. I struggled to form a sense of relation to this author as well, because the story that was provided was so vague. If this author would have included content about how strong or important their relationship was with their cousin prior to their conflict, I think that would have allowed me as the reader to feel more emotionally invested in a piece like this.

When I assume the role of the audience, I personally would prefer a writer to overshare rather than under-share. I don’t find a problem with oversharing at all, considering that an important component of the memoir genre still requires the writer to make a connection with the reader. Obviously, it seems to be easier for a writer to make a stronger emotional connection with the audience when they overshare, rather than when they give the reader very little explanation for why and how their experience offers universal meaning.

In Growing Up In Therapy, although it may be arguable that the author overshares, Dunhamn utilizes this process to her advantage when crafting her writing. Dunhamn properly uses “show” instead of “tell”, including specific details of her experience that she vividly associates with each description of events she wrote. This worked in her favor because it helps me as the reader to interpret what specific details stuck out to her during each point in her life; therefore, I am better able to place myself in Dunhams shoes and read her story as if it was my own. She uses her writing as a platform to express what exactly she was thinking at that time, writing in first person/present tense.

Dunhamn begins her passage with, “I am eight, and I am afraid of everything”. Her decision to write in first person, present tense, is one of the most powerful tools an author can utilize in this genre of memoir; there is no better way to vividly usher the reader into their past experiences rather than using this tool.

If Dunham were to have said, “When I was eight, I was afraid of everything”, it would feel more like you are reading about someone else. Because she chose to use “I am”, I felt like I was reading about myself since the first sentence. The goal of the memoir intends to extract the reader from reality, and instead make them experience your collection of events that you intended to write for them. Growing Up In Therapy elegantly exemplifies this technique. I didn’t just feel like I was living vicariously through Lena Dunham’s childhood. In the mere 15 minutes it took me to read this passage, I felt like Lena Dunham’s childhood was my own. The style in which she wrote this can leave lasting impressions on the reader, as it allowed me to feel Dunham’s real emotions as my own real emotions throughout this passage.

To reconstruct a memory that was experienced first hand, it can be incredibly difficult to portray certain events in a way that will collectively leave the reader with the same impression that it originally had on the author when it happened. I think Dunham successfully accomplished this task within her memoir.

Although I preferred Dunham’s work, I do argue that both of these narratives rang true to me as the reader. Neither piece seemed embellished, and they both can be read with honesty and truth. While truthfulness is one of the most important components of a memoir, all preference aside, I believe both of these pieces elegantly adapted into well written memoirs that have the ability to captivate the right audience.